Sanc†uary

2010-02-21T07:26:00.000-08:00

I will endure. Love is simple, but it is definitely not easy. There are bound to be hardships, but it could be overcomed. That's the power of love.

Many people are telling me how this relationship would not work out etc etc. Despite our different lifestyles. It doesnt have to be this complicated. I said I love her for who she is, and it will be that way. Even if she go to pubs and all, i will still love her as much, although i dont like her to go to all that places.

I really love her a lot, although there are a lot of times when i feel so fucked up inside due to so many things. But at the end of the day,i still want to hug her and tell her that she's not alone.

All these emotions are really taking a toll on my heart now, and my chest problems just have to add on to this. I don't know, but i can only pray to God. I pray to Jesus to teach me how to love her, and how to help her. I want to love her like He does.

Perhaps the world might just end tomorrow, or i may be gone anytime. I dont know, but i just want to love with all i have, even if the pain in my heart and all the hurt kills me. I am fool.. but i love my girl.

Vin

2010-02-20T10:47:00.000-08:00

Why am i feeling like this? I should be happy, right? I dont know. I'm so worried about her. She's like a little girl running around, with all the dangers around, so near.

I'm a jealous boyfriend. I dont like to hear her talk about her ex. I dont want to hear them. I want to erase them. I them to completely disappear from her memory.

I'm a protective boyfriend. Over protective or am i just a fool? I feel like destroying everything that insults her, even if it means breaking my own body. But i cant do it. I dont have the strength to, and i feel like a retard when my actions make her upset.

I don't like her to go to clubs, pubs, drink or talk to other guys. She may not like it, but it's for her own good in the long run. I just dont like it. Take it or leave it or leave me..

I'm seriously fucked up with all the anger in me. Any single shit nonsense could blast that extreme murderous intent up to my head and i could fuck anyone up in that instant. I dont know how... but i need to rant, i need to vent. but how? but where?
I could not even fucking punch a wall in my house toilet. I cannot scream, i cannot shout, my lungs hurt like fuck after that. Can i cry? maybe under the sheets. or in the showers. And i have to cry silently, like fuck does it feel satisfying when you got a shitload to unleash.

i feel so insecure, like what i do does not even matter. i am giving my 100%. i dont give a fuck if it's my first love. i want it to be my last. that's how commited i am. i dont know why, but i am hurt like fuck that i dont even know. there is just this pain in me, this concern, this jealousy, this insecurity, this anger.i dont know...

2010-02-12T22:29:00.000-08:00

Forget about the previous post. I have my awesome and loving girlfriend, so it doesn't matter anymore. :D

2010-02-12T01:04:00.000-08:00

What does it feel like to grit your teeth everywhere, every place, everytime? It feels like I've gotten used to it, but somewhere inside me, there is still this part of me that is storing all these frustrations. That side of me who wants to burst out at every single 'gangster' wannabe on the streets and screw them up.

What can i do when someone on the street just randomly say to his friends "Eh, want beat that guy (me) up or not?" It fucking irritates and provoke me to the core when i am some 'toy' or some subject they seem they can mess with. Indeed with my current body state now, i can do nth but walk away gritting my teeth. Deep inside, there's always this urge to destory everything to the deepest core when i am annoyed over the smallest thing like smelling some asshole smoking into my face.
I am having trouble controlling it now. I dont know when i can keep smiling. Perhaps one day i'll just smash someone's head while smiling without myself knowing it. ARGH, i'm just letting loose here. You'll never know my frustrations until you are actually me.

Vin

2009-09-19T07:51:00.001-07:00

Wow. Lots of dust here. Did not post for quite sometime already.. hmm. Holidays are..
lets see... Holidays could either be a curse or a blessing. Too bad I am sorta stuck in between. School is hell, holidays are like prison days. Perhaps there is nothing
for me to look forward to. Now, I look forward only to gatherings with my clique, and going to Amplify fridays. I seem to be missing something.. or rather that feeling of excitement. The excitement of meeting new people, the excitement of making new friends.. Maybe I am too old for this. I feel like I am.

Sorry for the crap. Am so bored till i typed without thinking.. Ah well. I kinda missed that feeling back then.. Those what you call "warmth" i received back when
I was in the hospital, I treasured it. And I pretty much know I'll never get them back.

Gahh spammed loads of crap today. Probably due to the lack of good sleep... probably..

Vin

2009-08-22T05:03:00.000-07:00

Helloooo. Went to gym today at sengkang with clique. Did some intense training ( for me cuz it is intense when you dont have enuff sleep before hand -.-) Today focused on training biceps and deltoids , and abit of abs. Was thinking of training pecs but i abit scared cuz of my last time operation ~_~ so didnt train tt part.

then went back home and sleep. ji tao toh on bed. Just woke up and i can feel the soreness of my muscles already. After effect of not training for so long... Haiz. I'm still weak physically. never mind , gonna train and rest up my body in this upcoming hols. To be useful i need to be strong first. not gonna touch the legs because it is already strong as it is ; my upper body needs that training.

Ok , that's about it. Hmm thursday gonna have Masquarade party in school for School of Design ~_~. Sian.

Vin

2009-08-18T04:41:00.000-07:00

Yoz. Been quite awhile since i last posted. Was really really busy. Rushing projects and all. Sept 5!!!! Gotta hang on till then. Hmm for now...I am really extremely tired to the max. Body's really being pushed to the limits. Anyway was just randomly watching some vids just now and i came across this. This vid is super cute , and RX brings back childhood memories. Enjoy~

2009-08-05T09:15:00.000-07:00

Hello.. was sick these few days. Had cough and flu. Was quite bad so went to see a doc and got 4 days mc. Haiz , i think i am gonna get left behind alrdy. everyone have alrdy done their work and while the sch is rushing like no freaking business , i am struggling with health and work. Urgh. My back is aching also.. dunno why , maybe cuz my sleeping pose wrong T~T
Oh yah the above image was photoshopped with some effect i cant rmb while i explored PS today.. I really need to hone my photoshop skills sia. If not really cnt catch up le.

Haa anyway baptism day is nearing! i am uber excited xDDD

Vin

2009-07-29T22:40:00.000-07:00

Note to myself. Homework left:
1) VAS silkscreen prints by friday
2) FDS model mock up do during the weekend
3) HTi Journal research
4) GC personal profile

2009-07-26T09:25:00.000-07:00

Very tired these days.. Schoolwork keeps piling as i struggle to meet everyday. Felt like i could collaspe anytime now , with the extreme lack of sleep. but i shall not complain , cuz my family relies on me. that's the responsibility of an only child i guess. hah , praise God for blessing me with the strength to hold on. Gotta work hard , no matter how tired i may be. Every effort is worthwhile. Melvin jia you!! xD

Vin

2009-07-22T19:21:00.000-07:00

This video is uber epic. Like the way they pair up the characters. Especially Vincent x Tifa and Notcis x Stella part. Wish I could have the same or even better skills one day.

2 cuties <3

2009-07-13T20:31:00.000-07:00

Heeellloooo. Gonna post about 2 cute little kitties I've found while doing my service learning project.

After doing our service learning at Acres for about 1 and a half hours , my group decided to take a short break. We went to the nursery opposite of Acres and explored around. It was overall a nice and peaceful place , and no one was in there. We spotted one grey cat lying on the table , so Aminah and Raihannah went to disturb him. Haha , bet the kitty felt disturbed.

After that a lady came in , i bet she is the owner of the nursery. She spoke to us in a friendly tone ; and seeing us play with the cat , she told us that there are 2 more kittens at the other side of the nursery. SWEET. So we followed her and we saw 2 litle kittens lying around randomly near some plants. They were soooooo cute and small. There was a white one and a black one.

The white one is called Gigi. Haha she's a noisy little fella , like a little white tiger. keep mewing away. The black one's called Gugu. He's the silent type. Never heard him mewed once. Gigi on the other hand is so randomly naughty. HAHA cuz she keep making noise and move here and there. ( Guess she's hungry )

Gonna post pictures of them :D

Hahaha yup. And see , my freaking hair is sooooooo long AND I DONT HAVE TIME TO CUUUUTTTT ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Vin

2009-06-30T06:42:00.001-07:00

H-E-L-L-O Hello! Haha. Today was quite okay actually , actually felt kinda sianed cause have VAS class and ONOW ( whereby my project is not even established and it's just pure epic sianess to face the music...lalala~.

Had lunch with the girls at foodcourt 3. Then when queing up to buy food , Valerie says i am flirting with the auntie... i was like WTF!!! -.- Cuz i cannot hear wad the auntie said , so i kinda spaced out.. then Valalalalala say i acting cute to the auntie! LOL!!zzz Okay anyways , during the 3 hour break , didnt bring my BDC workbook to do in that free time , so watched "Absolute Boyfriend" with Charmaine using the lappy. The show is dam cute but yet a little sad..At first is i watch de , then Charmaine came , then she watch with me , then got addicted. HAHA! ;p

VAS was okay. Surprisingly , after a brief , we were dismissed! O_O
.
.
.
.
To buy materials for the next project.....(-.-) Nah the school's not so kind to let us off for nothing. So went with the girls to art friend cuz Claudia wanted to buy the Lino cut , aka NILON CARD ( by Miss Claudia). LOL!! Supposed to make our very own print. Of our own portrait. After printing , then gotta carve out the white parts of the print. This is something we did.

Haha yup that's all. Tatata~

Vin

2009-06-27T21:29:00.000-07:00

Hello people (: Just came back from the Cathedral Of the Good Sheperd. Mass is awesome. Jesus is awesome! :DD The choir there is really good! Their voices are really strong and it they are so good that they remind me of angels praising God.Thank God for them , and I'm really happy that they put their talent to good use. Some people in this world have the most gifted abilities , but yet they use them for the wrong reasons.

Anyway after the mass , Father Paul made an announcement to us catechumens.Our baptism date is set on 16th August. When i first heard that , it suddenly struck deep into my being. 16th August..... that was the day when i got pneumothorax (lung collaspe) , the day when i fell. That was the incident which made me experience God the strongest in my whole life. It was the time when i was totally helpless , and when i could not depend on my own strength anymore ; God picked me up. It was this time when i truly felt the love of God for me and turning point for me in my life.

And it is on the same date , 16 August , that i am going to be baptised. I will be the day when i start life anew , living in the Lord Jesus Christ , and with the Lord living in me. Like a baby i will be born again , fresh from baptism. I find it hard to believe.. could this be a mere coincidence? the baptism was supposed to be during sept or towards end of the year , but it was suddenly brought forward. To 16th of August. Faith tells me it cannot be just a coincidence.. This perfect mystery of God left me in awe and dumbfounded. The day when i fell , will be the day when i am picked up by God. It is as if a message from God , gently reminding me that he will pick me up no matter what , even if i fall.

And i really like to share this with you readers... because it is just too amazing. I can't describe it with words. The events happening in my life , and even the recent ones when i am sooo confused within , trying to seek assurance and answers...God gave me one today. The answer that only i know. Praise God!

Vin

Decision? A sacrifice.

2009-06-14T03:41:00.000-07:00

It all came down to this. After many sleepless days , it is all finally taking a toll on my body. Weak as it is after 3 freakin operations ; despite the fact that i am training like mad to get my physique back , work and stress just have to push me down to zero. Or perhaps negative. After those nights , i had a flu (not H1N1.. ZZZ), kept sneezing and all. It was horrible. All just to complete my work. Now my lung is feeling weird after all these shits. And i have to go on again after the hols, which is not hols to me since the shitty school made us do assignments ; like after a few weeks of serious hell and we still can't get a decent 100% no homework shit break.

Not only this , but more importantly ( yes even more important than my health) my spiritual life is at jeopardy. Ever since the school started , i seemed to have drifted away from God. I am a person who needs help with prayer life already , and this stressful @%#@^@^ life made it even worse. I am lagging far behind in my RCIA class now , with lots of reflection not done. I've let a lot of people there down.
I feel bad too , not being able to sacrifice time for God ( since every second counts , even if i work 24 hours straight i may not get the job done well ).

And i soon find myself crumbling away.. I felt so demoralised with no one to console me. In school, life's tough. Everyone may seem to care , but the actual fact is that everyone's for themselves. I've lived through enough of this shit to actually pen this down. In the instance when you desperately needed help , you are turned down. And this hurts much more than you'd expect.

I've decided. I'm not gonna give so much a crap about my school stuff already. People can go fight and kill themselves to score the best , but God will always be first in my life. I will make a sacrifice for God , and it is only right so. Jesus died on the cross for us ; the ultimate sacrifice and act of love. So i am not gonna let some mortal bullshit ruin my relationship with God. No way.

Vin

2009-06-03T12:59:00.000-07:00

Good mornin peeps. It's 4 am now , and i'm supposed to be working on my 100 photos stuff. Oh well , since the disc is formatting now i might as well blog to relieve some stress. TERM BREAK IS COMING IN 2 DAYS TIME!! WOOOHOOO~ Can't wait man. I am seriously gonna jump and do crazy stunts at the end of that day.

Gonna post some of my 100 lousy photos here.. including one "zi pai" one. LOL. Honestly i am not into all these zi pai thingy. But for the sake of venturing deep into photography , i started to snap weird things. ( Dun worry , no obscene stuffs included ;p)

Vin

2009-06-02T18:19:00.000-07:00

Stand In The Rain

She never slows down.
She doesn't know why but she knows that when she's all alone, feels like its all coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long and she fears if she cries that first tear, the tears will not stop raining down

[CHORUS]
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself and the fears whispering if she stands she'll fall down
She wants to be found
The only way out is through everything she's running from wants to give up and lie down.

[CHORUS]
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
Stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found

[CHORUS]
So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it's all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day, whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

This song sounds so familiar to my heart..

Vin

2009-06-01T17:27:00.000-07:00

What if one day you woke up from your slumber , discovered that you are still alive , and could not move at all? You find that the pain still lingers in your chest , and every breath is a struggle. But nothing beats the pain of losing her , the one you love. You wished you were dead , but yet somehow you are only half dead.

The cold air only amplified your pain even further. You just can't forget what had happened , you can't explain it. It is hard to believe , after these years.. what you've always held on to was taken away in an instance. You struggled to live , trying to forget this past. But the scars remain , you see them everyday. You feel different. Every breath you take now is different from before ; it just seems so thin now. You can never feel the same air again.

You continued to move on , only to find youself in a totally different world from before. Hungry wolves surround you. You are the only wolf with a different colour. They looked like they could gang up on you and rip you off anytime. With the pain instilled within you , you turned defensive. You are ready to fight back anytime , even if you must die doing so ; you should be dead in the first place.

You then stray from the pack.. growing weary. The scars are still there to haunt you. The purpose is lost , you stray away. Wandering in the fog , wondering where you could go to next...you want a home , a home that will accept you , a home that will not ignore you , a home that loves you for who you are. And I've found the home. The Lord's abode.

Vin

2009-05-31T08:27:00.000-07:00

What is your True Fear? Your Result: Being Alone While you may act like you don't care on the outside, on the inside your biggest fear is being alone. You can be quite shy and reserved. You feel like a lot of times people don't really see the real you. You're afraid that no one will really truly love you, and that you will be alone for the rest of your life. On the inside you are great person, so just remember that and don't let your shy nature get the best of you! If you don't want to be a lone then you need to make an effort to be with someone. Show the people that you care about that you really love them, and chances are someone will always be there, even if you think they won't.
Losing Someone
Looked down on
Death
Where Your life is Going
Disappointment
Commitment
What is your True Fear? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Got this from Galv's blog. Quite accurate i guess , but sometimes , i just feel like being alone. Must have gotten used to it already. =/

Vin

2009-05-25T17:20:00.000-07:00

Helloooooo. I am in school now , blogging here since class is still 30 mins away. Hmm
life in poly suc-- wait i mean life in school of design sucks. It's ironic how we can get good inspirations and make well-thought out design when they are making our schedule even tighter than JC ( or around the same..)This is such a joke. I couldn't even take it seriously anymore.

Oh well , on a brighter note , term break is coming!! xD But not before this bloody hectic week. Damn. Was randomly looking through the pics in my lappy , and i found some crazy webcam photos that i took with my classmates in studio. Some of them make me look so unglam..but not posting here hehe. :)

Ps: I LOL-ed at Val's face. No offense!;p HAHA

2009-05-03T21:54:00.000-07:00

Hello , gosh nowadays i really have no time to blog at all. Thanks to sch of design.. keep spamming assignments sia. Haven even week 2 alrdy got 9 assignments and 1 major project (Brickboy..). I was like wtf man , i thought poly life is supposed to be dam slack , but to my horror , i am working my ass off! It's lke superhuman training programme. No joke. I even experienced not sleeping for more than 24 hours. Yes , 24 hours all right.From evening to night to morning , then go sch , then go dinner and movies , then went home to slp.

Stupid project la , make me paint for one whole night , next day become zombie liao. And the Visual Art Studio worse sia , have to paint 154 squares with different colours , and they only lke provide us with 3 primary colours and black and whie. The rest we are supposed to mix by ourselves! WTFFF!! Argh. Sucks man.

Their deadlines are all so close somemore... zzzz i am afraid this weaker-than-average-human body could not sustain for much longer if this continues...Before i can even become a superhuman i wud have become a zombie first -.-

Anways , fortunately i have awesome classmates :D Here are some crazy photos i took with them in class.

Okays that's about it. Will post again if i have the time. IF i had the time. (:
Ciao ,

Vin

2009-04-05T21:04:00.000-07:00

Woohoo One Piece opening 11 is out. One of the most epic opening I've seen. Haha the song is "Share the world" by Dong Bang Shin Ki (DBSK). Enjoy!

Vin

2009-04-02T20:28:00.001-07:00

Heeellllooo~ It's been some years since i posted. I felt it was that long a time ~_~ Hahaha i just can't find anything to post about... Haiz holiday life jiu shi zhe yang. I AM BOREDDDDDD!!! Can't wait for poly to start sia.. Wonder what types of classmate will i meet. Hmm...

On the other hand , RCIA is going well , and i've learnt a lot of things there (: Oh yah i was surprised the worship team asked me to join them and sing with them sia. Cuz i told them i was once from choir , then Claris the leader went to audition me. LOL. Nostalgic feeling. It's been quite awhile since i sang.. Since the Lord has given me this chance to praise and worship him , i am willing to pick it up again :D

Yups so that's about it..oh btw this song is nice, enjoy ;)

Be Yourself

Someone falls to pieces
Sleepin all alone
Someone kills the pain
Spinning in the silence
To finally drift away

Someone gets excited
In a chapel yard
Catches a bouquet
Another lays a dozen
White roses on a grave

To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
Someone finds salvation in everyone
And another only pain
Someone tries to hide himself
Down inside himself he prays
Someone swears his true love
Untill the end of time
Another runs away

Separate or united?
Healthy or insane?
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do
And even when you've paid enough, been pulled apart or been held up
With every single memory of the good or bad faces of luckdon't lose any sleep tonight
I'm sure everything will end up alright

You may win or lose

But to be yourself is all that you can do
To be yourself is all that you can do

2009-03-10T19:05:00.001-07:00

You have changed
I have changed
Just like you
Just like you

For how long
For how long
Must I wait
I know there's something wrong
Your concrete heart isn't beating
And I've tried to
Make it come alive

No shadows
Just red lights
Now I'm here to rescue you

Oh I'm still alive
I'm still alive
I can't apologise no
Oh I'm still alive
I'm still alive
I can't apologise no

So silent
No violence
But inside my head
So loud and clear
You're screaming
You're screaming
Cover up with a smile
I've learned to fear

Just sunshine
And blue sky
This is all again
For living here
Come fire
Come fire
Let it burn and love come racing through

Oh I'm still alive
I'm still alive
I can't apologise no
Oh I'm still aliveI'm still alive
I can't apologise no

Learn to lose
Learn to win
Turn my face against the wind
I will move fast
I will move slow
Take me where I have to go

2009-03-09T20:53:00.000-07:00

Hellooo... Hmm these few days i am having some weird dreams. Dreams means nothing , i know. But the dream almost happen every night for me since a few days ago ~_~... Ahhhh.. The dream is quite embarrassing also... Geeeezzz okay i guess i'll just post it out.

Everytime in my dream , i would be inside this world ( and the sky is freaking dark again ; day or night -.- ). I would be inside this huge cruise ship with a VERY weird structure. Instead of looking sleek and cool , it looks more like a olden - time town on water ~_~ But the good thing is there is a shopping mall. LOOL! Okay talking about shopping mall , my dream/nightmare begins... I am tagged with this girl , ( some girl with an attitude , always scolding and smacking me for dunno wad reasons, but sometimes good to me..) I dunno her name , and i dun really remember her looks ... But i just remember something. I am a navy trainee along with her ( -.- ) and we are together in the navy academy on board the ship.

So in the dream i brought her around the ship to play and stuff, look at carnivals , went to arcades (WTF!!!!) so i became sort of "attached" to her. And for freaking 3 days my dreams almost follow the similar outline -.- The last thing i rmb is when i was about to woke up , i got promoted to be a navy officer and got separated with her and i woke up...

Yeah , that's about it. Geeeeeeeez dun tell me i fell in love with someone from my dream?! ARGH this is ridiculous......... Okay bye bye

Vin

If we met in a dream...

2009-03-05T19:05:00.000-08:00

I thought I have learnt to forget,
but the dream brought everything back,
Those eyes , those smiles , that makes all pain worthwhile...
Real yet abstract , happy yet sad
For only in a dream shall it last,
I can never see that face again.
Woke up with tears , speechless and numb
This parting hurts even more , than what is
not done.
How I wish it is real..
When I hear you say "I love you "...
Till then , let's meet in our dreams again...

Vin

My Vision

2009-03-01T23:39:00.000-08:00

Hello , I'd like to talk about my vision.The vision that i saw during the last YISS (Youth In The Spirits Seminar). It was during the night of the outpouring of the Holy Spirit , when i spoke in tongues for the very first time , and after that i saw this one vision.

This is what i saw : I saw a portrait. In the background , it is the ocean , with a few mountains.On the foreground , it is a jungle-like place , with a frame made by leaves , exposing the ocean in the back ground.In the middle of this foreground , surrounded by the frame of leaves , is a single stalk of flower. It's petals are closed up , with a flame inside it's core. Petals are dropping down from the flower.

Then , i prayed to God laterwards , as i tried to figure out the meaning of this vision.After a few weeks , i think God have answered me through Nicholas. Haha. One day he sent me this song: "Who I Am" , by Casting Crowns. Before that , i was feeling quite moody , dunno why but i felt directionless.I still have faith , but it was just a low season of my life whereby i need some assurance. I always felt confused. Am i really accepted to join the Lord's family? I am non-baptised. Will people reject me? I felt insecured , almost from young till now. Then i listened to this song..

The lyrics are as followed :

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

So after listening to this song , I thought to myself. Is this a coincidence? I don't think so , because i believe in God. (: Praise the Lord!

Vin

2009-02-18T17:57:00.000-08:00

Cats are just too cute. Random.

Vin

2009-02-17T03:24:00.000-08:00

Hey , it's been awhile since i last posted. Gahhh due to some irritating fever , i am forced to stay on bed like for dunno how long. And my valentine's day is gone just like that. But oh well , maybe that's better , cause i have no idea how to spend it anyways. I am reeeaaaallllllyy borred right now. Well , not that i don't wanna find a job , but reality is , it is hard to find one in this times.. and i dun wanna do those jobs that cannot serve people directly. ( Read: Admin )

Hopefully Amplify will contact me about my serving post. Then i'll really have something to work hard on in the meantime. Hahaha.And finally , it begins. My RCIA is gonna commence this wed , which is tml night. Yays!! Time to learn more about my faith , and become a true Christian.Hmm that's all for now , tata~

Vin

2009-02-02T05:37:00.000-08:00

Forget it. My past ruins everything.. it's not me anyway.

Our Two Hands...

2009-01-19T02:14:00.000-08:00

I was having my quiet time one day , thinking about my servant-life.In what ways can i serve people? Then i look at my both hands. I stared at them for quite awhile , thinking about it. Ding dong! Suddenly a thought came into my mind. This phrase came into my head : " One hand to carry my own cross , the other to bear the weight of others' crosses "

God made us with two hands , but not one. Why? It is simply because , we do not live for ourselves. The phrase really made quite an impact on me . Both of our hands ; which many has taken for granted , is there for a reason. Logically speaking , even with one hand , we can still do many things, more than enough to keep us survive. With the will , people with one hand can still cook , drive , and work. But why two? Isn't one enough then?

This is what i think. My reflection : God works in many mysterious ways. His wonders , His miracles , they all work in ways we find it hard to comprehend. Have you ever heard of this story?

One day , a man was about to drown in the ocean. He have great faith in God, and he prayed and asked God to reach out to him and save him. The man was hanging on to a log , and nothing else.His survival depends on that log( as a float).
Soon , a speedboat came. The driver shouted to him : "Hey are you okay? Let me bring you to the shore!" The faithful man replied , " No! God will save me! I know he will! Leave me alone" And so the driver left the man alone in the ocean , and went off.
Next , a boat came along. The fisherman aboard the boat offered to help him also , but the man rejected his help.
Finally , a helicopter. Yes , a helicopter , flew by and spotted the drowning man. The pilot let down the ladder , and asked the man to reach out to it. The man rejected the offer once again , waiting for God to save him. The man eventually drowned , and died. His soul then went to Heaven , where he met God. He asked God : "Oh Almighty God , why did you not hear me? I called out to you , but where were you??" God sighed and replied him : "My child , I heard you loud and clear. I tried to save you so many times , but you rejected My offer. First , I sent you a speedboat , then another boat , and even a helicopter! But you rejected them all! "(The End.)

This story teaches us that God IS with us. He is not from above , watching us and then decides to come down and help us. He is everywhere. God uses us to do His will. More specifically , our hands ; the two hands God has made us with. With one hand , we can be guaranteed survival. But then this other hand you have there is not "extra" . It is meant for you to help others , to serve others. It is for you to reach out to weak and needy people with that hand. If you can imagine the weak and needy people as people with only one hand ( only barely surviving the harsh world) , then use your other hand to reach out to them!

After all , two hands are needed to clap. When two hands clap , there is contact. Our hands ; beside being used to do God's will , it is also to provide that contact to others , to touch them (not in a bad way of course -.-), such that they will feel that God is so much alive! , not in a faraway Heaven , but so close to them! They see God in our very actions , actions produced by our hands. These hands that provide , that reaches out to others and to protect others.

Of course , if you allow the Devil to control you , your hands wont do any good. ( DUH) Fighting , killing , molesting... you name it. All these causes destruction and sadness , definitely not something God would provide , but we have this happy-yet-sad thing called "Choice". I strongly urge you all to not subject your hands to the path of destruction , because God did not make us for that. God gave us hands to Construct not destroy. It is like a test with a life-time duration ; whether you use your hands to do God's will , or use your hands to hurt others.

So the bottomline is this : Our hands are there to carry out God's will. God uses us , His favorite creation (humans duh -.- ) as a vessel to carry out His love , care and protection. As long as you have two hands (or more...) , you are obliged to help those who are in need. To end off , i would like to say this prayer , taught to me during the last Amplify Fridays session.

"Dear Lord Jesus , here i am. Let my words not be my words , but yours. Let my actions not be my actions , but yours. Lord , use me as you will. Amen. "

Vin

2009-01-12T03:48:00.000-08:00

Hey yoz ppl!!!!!!!! Weeeee~ Today is indeed a happy day , and a day filled with God's miracles and joy! Today , 12/1/09 , Monday is the 2008 GCE 'O' Levels result release date. Many are anxious to know what they get for their results , how well they have fared. Some are apathetic about it , not even bothered by it.For me and Nick , it is a day of revelation , not of the results but rather , what path God has set for us. The revelation of God's answer to our prayers , the revelation of God's miracles.

In the afternoon , at around 12.30pm , me and Nick went to pray at the CSC's "Adoration Room", where the Holy sacrament of the Lord is there. We prayed with all our hearts for the O level results.I prayed to the Lord that whatever He gave us , there is a purpose in it , and I am willing to accept anything He gives me. I prayed that the Lord will show His miracle on us , that even those considered as "no hope" cases people ;they will be amazed at how the Lord grants them flying colours in their results , and they shall bow down and worship Him. I also prayed that no matter what results we receive , we will still come back to CSC with a smile to praise and thank the Lord for what he have given us. (:

During the release of the 'O' level results , we were all very nervous , especially the waiting part. It is not the result , but rather the suspense that 'kills' us. But despite it all , i refuse to give in to fear. I put my hope in the Lord , and continued to hope till the end. When it was my turn , i was super nervous , but yet at the same time still holding on to the hope.

Mrs Jenny Ang then told me "Congratulations , Melvin " . Then Mrs Krishna who was holding on to my results was like " Oh no , Mrs Ang you revealed too fast! I didn't even have the chance to scare him..*laughs* " Then i took my results while time stopped at that very instance.

Maths. C6. Wut? LOL!! I actually got a C6 for my maths! I thought i was really gonna flung maths since i anyhow did it and since like sec 1 my maths is F9 case all the way! The miracle of the Lord , right before my very eyes... He broke my curse/chains of F9!! hahaha praise the Lord , Chainbreaker! Then i looked at my English result. Wut? A2!!! OMGOSH , i never seen it coming! The best i've estimated for my English was B3 , A2 was totally out of my calculations. Praise and thank the Lord indeed!

In total , my final L1R4 is 11 points , L1R5 is 17 points. Nick and Zong made it too!! Another miracle of the Lord , in front of my very eyes! The Lord has heard my prayers :D After that , we went back to CSC to praise and thank God for the results.

Moral of the day : Have Faith and Hope in the Lord. For no one who puts their Faith in the Lord will go disappointed. You may feel so at first , but in time to come you will thank the Lord for the road He have given you. So have faith my friends , even till the very end , dont give up. :D

Vin

A Nightmare that I was satisfied with...

2009-01-07T17:36:00.000-08:00

Hmm...yesterday I had a nightmare as the title states, and this time it turned out uhh.. how do you put it... "Right". Well you guys know that when u dream you can't control your emotions and all right? Like even if there is someone you so wanna punch in your dreams but u just didn't. (LOL , jk )For me , i watched myself in this nightmare unleashing my faith for the Lord , Chirst Jesus.

You may wonder how am i gonna remember all the details of the dream right? Well i just woke up , and decided to blog it down while the details are still fresh. I hope this can inspire or encourage readers about our faith in the Lord. So this is how my nightmare went....

I received an SMS from Nick , asking me whether do i wanna watch a gundam movie or not. For some reason , the world in my nightmare is located in Singapore , but the sky is dark -.- It is as if almost ALL of my dreams or nightmares , the skies are either sanguine or dark.. Don't know what is going on man.. Okay anyway ,back to the nightmare. My handphone at that moment became very cool all of a sudden. I seemed to be choosing my wallpapers at that time , because all of them suddenly became so cool for me. ( -.- ) So i agreed with Nick and prepared to meet him.

I saw him and we boarded one bus together. Somehow he became super blur in my nightmare , losing direction and all. Then the bus became very crowded with people. For dunno what reason , Nick left the bus! I was like quite angry due to his immense blur-ness in my nightmare. So i continued to board the bus while i called him. He apologised and ask whether wanna change movie or not , since we will surely be late due to us separated. The movie he suggested next was space-horror film. And i really have no understanding why would i say yes to that. (Should have seen it coming that it is going to be a nightmare -.- )Therefore , we respectively went on our own ways to the movie.

Suddenly , i was shifted to a scene in a toilet -.- I was supposed to bathe before i go meet Nick again. Now this is the spooky part. The toilet is so darn quiet , and the lights are dim and sanguine ( once again...) Then i was showering inside with the mirror directly in front of my face. It was dam spooky and scary , sending chills down my spine , but i decided to do something ( which i would never have in other nightmares). I opened my mouth , had a leap of faith , and kept singing " Alleluia , praise the Lord!" very loudly , repeating over and over again. Then i shouted " Lord Jesus , by your power , i pray that you banish all evil in this place , let them bow down to You Messiah , Son of God!!" Suddenly i wasn't that scared anymore. In fact, i felt this power of faith , this flame in me , evoked by the Holy Spirit. I felt strong even in that lonely , dark place , totally naked and vulnerable. Because God is with us..and by waiting on the Lord , strength will rise! (:

So therefore dear readers , this is how powerful faith can be. Sometimes u feel it , sometimes you don't. But do not be discouraged , because faith is NOT a feeling nor emotion. It is a gift within you , sent by the Holy Spirit. So when you don't feel it , do not be sad, because it will definitely activate in times whne u least expected. Have faith , and keep it. Keep fighting against ourselves , till the Lord claim us. Amen!

Vin

2008-12-25T08:11:00.000-08:00

Wahahahs! Merry Christmas HOHOHO x]

I wanna dedicate this post to my YISS group , SFA (St.Francis of Assisi)!! :DD
Wanna thank you guys for journeying and grow with me during this 4 short days of YISS Liberation.Though it may seem short , but we've gone through a lot emotionally , it's as though we've been through many thick and thins together. I wanna praise and thank God for letting me know you guys , and i will really treasure this friendship that i've forged through God's grace. :D Hope we can go to masses together , meet up at Amplify Fridays , and never forget this life changing experience we onced shared.Let us share our troubles and woes with one another , and pray for one another , as well as to remind one another of our mission! This i pray in Lord Jesus's name , Amen!!

Fun shot! :D

SFA rocks! x]]

2008-12-24T07:01:00.000-08:00

Hey guys , it's just a few moments more to Christmas! I am sooo excited (: Even though i am down with fever , but this ain't gonna bring me down! Praise the Lord , and thank Him , for even when i am sick. I thank Him for blessing me with such an awesome mother , taking care of me while i am helpless. Lord , indeed i see you in my mum. (: And Lord , i surrender everything to you , my sickness , my problems. You take charge (((:

Meaning of Christmas. Christmas is the birth of our Saviour , Lord Jesus! It is the season of giving , to give whatever you have to people. To spread love , spread the Good News to everyone in this joyous occasion! You might be frustrated , thinking of what presents to get for your friends and relatives. But take a step back and think , are the gifts more important? Or is the love you have for the other person while giving whatever gifts you wanna give the main point? (:

Therefore friends , do not worry bout the presents , for it is the thoughts that counts. As long as you have the intention , the love for the other person , i am sure whatever the gift(s) you are giving will be extra special!

Here is the most important part of Christmas. What gift(s) is more significant than the Giver of gifts Himself? Christmas is the birth of our Saviour , birth of the Messiah!! God gave His precious Son , the Darling of Heaven to us! Rejoice!! :D

Christmas. Christmas = Christ + Mass. Without Christ , there will not be mass. So treasure this season of giving , enjoy the peace our Lord has blessed us with. Share the love with your families , friends and relatives! Love is one of the best gifts we humans could give (: May the birth of Christ our Saviour give us new life , Amen!!Praise the Lord , Alleluia!!

Vin

We are never restricted in God's love....

2008-12-21T05:11:00.000-08:00

The deaf may not hear , but they hear Jesus saying how much He loves them everyday , every second..

The blind may not see , but they see Jesus , waving to them with a gentle smile , brightening up their world of darkness..

The mute may not speak , but they cry out in their Spirit : " Holy Holy Holy is the Lord God Almighty , Who is , Who was , and is to come!!! "

The lame may not run , but their Spirit runs forever , forever towards God's embrace..

The handicapped may be incomplete in this world , but Jesus makes them whole in God's Kingdom..

The mentally unsound may not think normally , but Jesus gives them the greatest wisdom..

The weak may be bullied by others , but God gave them power to rule in His Kingdom..

You may be a loser in the eyes of people , but in God's eyes you are more than a conqueror!

Rejoice! For there is/are no strings attached in God's love. He loves all of us unconditionally. You may be a rotten sinner , or a handicap , but little did you know that God loves you all the more. Always remember , it is in our weakness whereby God's strength in us is made perfect! We can never do things on our own strength , but if we rely on God , nothing in this world could bound or restrict us , walls will crumble! Chains will break! Darkness will fade! For God's love for us is infinite.....

Vin

2008-12-20T04:19:00.000-08:00

Hey guys. I am really really blessed by God to have such an awesome God sis! :D And i really love the present , thanks Cheryl! x]] Haiz i feel so bad.... only gave her a christmas card :(((

The box (: So nice.

The casing.Image of an angel.Cooool x]

Finally , the Rosary inside!!

So nice of my God sis right? Hahaha. Yup yup. Nowadays i keep praying to God , it's as if God is reminding me to intercede to Mother Mary too! HAHA. Praise and thank God! And my God sis too!! :DDD

Vin

Just a humble message to those willing to hear...

2008-12-18T07:34:00.000-08:00

Living in the real life is tough. Temptations and all sorts of heathen(worldy) sins corrupt us. But after all, we are human. The human nature in us made us sin , greed , hate , condemn, do immoral things.... etc. We are all empty shells , and this human nature of ours will eventually lead us to destruction.

But be happy brothers and sisters! The salvation to this problem is within you. Yes , within you. The Faith in the Lord Jesus , the Living God.The Holy Spirit sent by Him is our salvation. Human nature would eventually lead to Death , but if one lives in union with the Lord (doing things in His name to show love , and glorify Him), the Spirit will guide the person to Life. Life renewed by the Lord , free from all sins and bondage. A life without worries , a life filled with true happiness , a life without having to put on a fake mask , and the peace which no one and nothing else could provide.

Do you feel empty sometimes? Like you have thirst for something , a thirst you tried so hard to quench.And i don't mean the kind of thirst like the thirst for water. You listen to music , played games , hang out with friends. But the thirst doesn't go away.The thing you are finding is love. You may find love from your boyfriends/girlfriends , but somehow it just does not satisfy you. The answer is God , fountain of life , fountain of love. No one loves you more than God does , and His love is unconditional.It doesn't matter if you are a sinner. We all are. But God would really like to see us repent , and ask Him for forgiveness. His love is everywhere. Believe the Lord , for He says that everyone , even a simple act of opening the door for someone is love , and God shows His love through people like your parents , your friends , your siblings etc.

Take a step back and look. This world is utterly corrupted. Music bands and movies all promoting obscene and unholy things. Movies such as R21 movies promotes immorality , death metal musics and emo musics lead people and youths more into depression , or suicide even. What is this world coming to? Everyone puts on a mask. Why? To show that they are strong? That they are cool? They are so so mistaken. So what if you are stronger than the others? So what after you bullied them? If you truly gain satisfaction from doing this , then you are truly perverted.

And look , the world now boasts sin instead of acheivements!!! People would rather be proud of "Hey look , i've scared that guy. So noob right?" rather than "Hey! I helped an old lady to cross the road today!" Why? Cause they want to "save face" . They want to be "cool" , and believe the Lord , that is what human nature is like. They follow the world , enjoy worldy merry , indulge in things they think that are "cool". Little do they know that these will eventually destroy them , and humanity itself.

Sometimes , don't you feel like there is a sense of justice rushing up to you when u see someone being maligned for things that he did not commit? Don't you feel guilty when you've said a lie?Don't you feel bad when you shouted at your parents? These , my brothers and sisters , is the Holy Spirit, the good conscience within you , talking to you , speaking to you. It tells you what is right and what is wrong. But most people will just ignore it. They do what is wrong when they know it. They dare not expose themselves to the world , to show to the world that they have love in them. They fear the judgement of people. They are afraid that people will laugh at them , make fun of them.But fear not , for only God could truly pass judgement on us. When a passerby looks at you and make fun of you , just accept it , and walked away. That person is not going to be with you for the rest of your life. But God is! Fear God , not them.

By letting the Spirit to guide you my brothers and sisters , you will definitely lead a much much better life than you did before. Look beyond the reality of this world , for there is something far greater. To love , to serve , to do good. If everyone does this , wouldn't the world become a better place to live in? Everyone would serve and love people without their masks on , for they allow the Holy Spirit in them to guide them , to lead them. In the Bible , it says :"Now the Lord is the Spirit , and wherever the Spirit of The Lord is , there is Freedom"

Trust in God people , trust that good voice within you. Living amongst the heathen merry could only bring you a short while of freedom , but living in the Spirit frees you forever! I am a witness , a witness of the Lord , and here i am spreading the word for i truly changed! Life will definitely be much better , and you will truly experience the real freedom our Lord has promised us.

I hope through this message , i've at least inspired a few to do good and serve. I hereby make a stand that whatever i've said here is not for my own glory , but for God. I am just a candle who has been lighted by his love , and now trying to spread the flame of the Spirit... Let's strive to light up the world in God's love , as the world continues to sink in darkness. Praise and thank God!

Vin

Happy are those ...

2008-12-17T06:01:00.000-08:00

Who love , for they have God in them
Who serve , for they glorify God in their actions
Who endure , for they share the same sufferings of the Lord
Who resisted temptations , for God have given them the shield called "Faith"
Who were judged by others , for they know that they could only be judged by God Himself
Who were called "Crazy" while glorifying God , for they know that God does not see them as crazy
Who hope , for they believed in the Living God Jesus Christ
Who have thrown away pride and ego , for they know that these are obstacles between them and God
Who are innocent , for they do not share the heathen merry but instead , in God's joy
Who honour their parents , for they honour God in the same way
Who tells the truth , for they have the Holy Spirit in them
Who confessed their sins and repent , for they have reconciled in God's love
Who do not speak vulgarities , for they speak in languages that glorify God
Who believe God , for they have gained salvation
Who felt God's touch , for their lives will be forever changed

Most importantly ,happy are those who have God in their hearts.....for they have everything they will ever need.

By Vin

2008-12-17T05:19:00.000-08:00

Day 4

The last day of the awesome YISS camp. That day we had a very special speaker , can't remember his name (sorry) but he is humorous! He prayed over people who still can't speak in tongues , and all the rest who can prayed in tongues for them. After that , few by few were able to speak in tongues. Praise and thank God!!! Everyone can speak in tongues , but if you deny the Holy Spirit or do not have the Faith and Love , the tongue you speak in is just gibberish.St Paul said something like that also in the letter to the Corinthians.

After that the speaker said something about our calling. Life is like a race , but christian life is like a relay. Saints and disciples of Lord Jesus had ran the race , and now is our turn. It is our choice whether to take the baton or not.
The speaker then ask , those who want to take the baton stand up and go to the front of the room.

Then inside me , i just have this super strong urge to go to the front and take the baton and lead a new life. There is this voice in me asking to go for it , overcome my fears and just have a leap of faith. So i went for it , i went to the front and the rest who gathered at the front prayed. I prayed in tongues as the Holy Spirit outpours upon us again. I am not sure but , i saw a vision. A vision of many candles , different in size and shape , in all sorts of patterns. The flames lit up one by one. I prayed to God in tongues , that everyone would spread the fire , and light up the world in God's love. And mankind shall be saved.

I also prayed for people like Cheryl , Esther and the people in the room. I prayed that my prayers would reach God , and God would reach them. I also prayed for more to people to experience the Father's love , so that more people would laugh with genuine happiness. I then hear laughter across the room as the Holy Spirit does his work. I heard Moses laughing very loudly! Hahaha. It's as though their laughters are communicating with one another. I am not sure , for i closed my eyes. But deep in my heart , i longed for everyone to smile and laugh in God's embrace. How beautiful will the world truly be!

After this session , we had the concluding mass. We received the prayer of discipleship , and i am not sure what the process is called , but we ate salt. The saltly taste in our mouths , to remind us of our mission as Christians. I remembered something John ( not sure is John the Baptist or St john ) said. Something about what is salt when salt has lost it's saltiness? How true. Are we going to let this faith last? Or just be Christians in name? I've chosen to strenghten my current faith , and pick up the baton.

I've taken the baton and started running in faith and love ,in God's track. What about you? (:

Vin

2008-12-16T20:01:00.000-08:00

Day 3

That night was the night of the outpouring of the Holy Spirit , and the Gifts he bestowed upon us. Oh and i forgot to mention that the theme for Day 2 was : Jesus , The Son our Saviour. So the theme for the third day is about the Holy Spirit , the helper sent to us by Jesus our Lord.

But before i begin , that afternoon we had a little activity which helped us to learn more about the Holy Spirit and its gifts. We moved around in respective groups , at the hall area and went to different stations , where the different gifts were explained. So the 3 basic groups of the gifts are : The Gifts of Word , The Gifts Of Revelation , and The Gifts Of Power.

They are all split into 9 charismatic gifts all together , with 3 in each group. (There are still other gifts too , other than these 9. )

The Gift Of Word
Gift of tongues to speak to God , to pray over for others in a personal language whereby only God would understand.

Gift of tongues to speak what God has told you by the power of the Holy Spirit , and say it out in a foreign language.

Gift of interpretation of tongues , which is also known sometimes as prophecy.This is very important as what would the use of tongues when it only benefits you and me? As St Paul has said in the Bible , it is much more important to spread the word of God to the Church.Therefore this gift is to interpret the meaning of another's tongue , and then say it to the whole Church.

The Gifts Of Revelation

The Gift of Knowledge. The ability to gain sudden knowledge of something which is out of our human capablilities , like seen things we've never seen before , hear sounds we've never heard before. The sudden spiritual knowledge bestowed by the Holy Spirit.
The Gift of Wisdom. The ability where the Holy Spirit guides you , to understand the mysteries of God. The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of Truth , as Lord Jesus has proclaimed in (John 16:13) "When the Holy Spirit, who is the truth , comes , he shall guide you all into truth..."

The Gift of Discernment Of Spirits. This is the ability bestowed by the Holy Spirit within us to know whether a Spirit is good , or bad , in the surroundings or in a person.
The Gifts Of Power

The Gift of Faith. The Holy Spirit bestows upon a person a great amount of Faith , such that doubts of the Lord and God never exists.

The Gift of Healing. The Holy Spirit grants a person to have healing abilities. But remember , the person who is healing is only a vessel for God , ultimately it is God our Father who is healing the other person , channeling through the chosen one.

The Gift of Miracles. The ability to create miracles in the name of God. As the same , this and all gifts are ultimately used to glorify God.

Yup basically that's all about the gifts. On that night , we were being prayed over as the Holy Spirit was being outpoured upon us. I was being prayed over by John this time also , and he asked me what gifts would I desire. I said that i would like to have the gift of tongues. Actually before that , during my quiet time with God , i told Father that whatever gifts He would give me , i'll accept it with great humility, using these gifts i have to help others. And i also prayed that I'll be focus on desiring God Himself , rather than the gifts , for what could be greater than the Giver of gifts Himself?

Okay back to the main part , i said i wanted to receive the gift of tongues. John then told me to praise God and said "Alleluia". I opened up and praised God loudly and with faith. As i said "Alleluia" , John told me to say it faster. This was a little bit of problem for me , as my tongue isn't that flexible and the "le" and "lu" syllabus were difficult for me to pronounce - _ -

However I was suddenly reminded of what I've prayed to God earlier : To seek Him and not the gifts. So i let go my focus on the pronounciation , and prayed to the Holy Spirit that he would guide me , as i pour out my love in my prayers. Soon i find that as i focused on God , my tongue starts to sort of curled , and my "Alleluia" turned into a sort of unclear mumbling. Then i continued to pray in faith , and soon i realise i should just pour out the sounds in my head. What seems to be a foreign language sound began to come out of my mouth (it sounds Arabic o.o ). John then congratulated me , that I've received the gift of tongues. I was so surprised , i opened my eyes to look at him , although i wasn't suppose to.

So i sat down , and continued to pray for the rest whom havent received the gifts. I prayed for Nicholas in my new tongue for he too , really desired the gift of tongues. I later found out my tongues is a mature tongue , where there are a few syllabus in it , and it forms a shape of a normal phrase in a foreign language. Cheryl , my God sis , received the baby tongues, whereby the syllabus contained "lalalalala" . With more practice , i am sure she'll be able to receive the mature tongue! Jia you Cheryl! :D

That's all for Day 3 , praise and thank God for everything that night , and my new gift to pray over for others in tongue. You see brothers and sisters , I am not a baptised Catholic. So if a rotten sinner like me can receive God's love , you can too! It doesn't matter if you are baptised or not , it is the Faith and Love within you that matters! :D

Vin

2008-12-16T05:57:00.001-08:00

Day 2

We had 'The reconciliation of the Sacred Sacrament' and 'Healing' session that night.
Before we received healing and be liberated , we need to face our sins.We must face the truth before we can truly repent. So on that night, we had confession.As I am not a baptised Catholic yet , i was extremely nervous on how the confession would go.When it was my turn , i walked to the priest with a confidence in confessing all my sins and be renewed , for i remembered the phrase "Look not on our sins , but on the Faith of your Church." And according to St Paul , he said something like God would not keep accounts of our sins , but rather He want us to repent and turn to Him
instead.
However when it was my turn , the father told me that since I am a non baptised Catholic yet ,I am not bound by sins.So he prayed for me , and i left , feeling a tad disappointed. However when i went back up to the session room , I just sat down and confessed all my sins to Jesus. I lifted them up and prayed for forgiveness , so that i would be liberated of these chains.
After that , it was the Healing session. After the reconciliation , we need to be filled up by God's Love and touch.Everyone was being prayed over by facils. When it was my turn , i was being prayed over by John. He asked me what i would like to be prayed over for.I told him , and he asked me if I believed in Jesus. I firmly said "Yes!" After that , i could feel a strong force on my head. My whole body felt light and numb , and i fall to the ground ( rested in the spirit). I felt this intensity within me.. my eyelid kept twitching on its own , and my eyes could not open. The Holy Spirit is working. I saw an outline of Jesus , our dearest Lord praying over me , as i lie down. I began to keep praising him as i lay on the floor.
After that i felt truly liberated!!! I felt Jesus's love and touch!! Nothing could express my emotions , and i just kept praising God. Alleluia!! Haha. I felt this peace ,that i've never ever felt before. I feel changed , liberated , empowered! Praise and thank God!!
After that , it's lights out time , and thankfully it's not so cold that night. Praise and thank God!( for day 2 also x] ) HAHAHA!

Vin

2008-12-15T02:54:00.000-08:00

Hi guys. I am back from 4 days of YISS (Youth in the spirit seminar)camp at the CSC (Catholic Spirituality Centre ), organised by Amplify ministry. :D

Many of you guys may wonder: "What is this YISS about?" YISS is a seminar which purpose is to reach out to youths all over Singapore , to experience the amazing and indescribable love of God, our Creator , as well as to forge a deeper relationship with Him.The theme for this year's YISS (the 20th YISS) is "Liberation".

Day 1

So me and Nick decided to meet each other first , before going to CSC. We decided to meet at Hougang Mac.He was a little late , so i had breakfast first, and then set off with him to CSC , feeling excited as we were anticipating what we would be doing there. So with our heavy baggages ; literally and metaphorically , we walked with heavy footsteps to the gates of CSC,with our regrets , our sins ,our unforgiveness, our shames , and our hurt.
However , when we reached there , we were overwhelmed with welcomes from the facilitators at the entrance ;one of which is my group's facil , Joseph. Praise God! I felt so warm by their welcomings , i was not used to it.We registered at the hall area at the first floor , and 'checked' in into our dorm.We were very nervous , and we saw many other participants.We didn't talk much to the rest at first , but we made a new friend there , Gabriel.He was older than us by quite a lot , and praise God , for he was the first friend we made there.
After that , we went up to the session room for icebreakers and introduction. The icebreaking session really helped me a lot , as even before the camp proceeds , i felt liberated a little of my anxiety. Praise God! Hahaha.After that we had Praise and Worship sessions , and went to meet my group and lunch.My group was St. Francis of Assisi a.k.a SFA , and Nick's group is St.Ignatius of something (pardon me for forgetting =x)So we separated into our respective groups.
I met my groupmates , and initially , i felt really alienated ,as there was no one i knew in my group. I was worried , really worried that i could not open up to them. But in the end , i decided to let God do His thing , to just lead me wherever He wants me to go , to meet, to feel. My group consisted of Joseph (facil) , Antonia (Facil) , Rowena , Benjamin , Cheryl ,Moses , Esther and Beverly.All of them i tell you , these 8 very special people God has lead me to meet , had journeyed with me throughout these 4 days of life-changing experience, going through thick and thin together as we formed the almost instant bond. Praise God!
Then we had a speaker's session whereby inspiring people whom experienced God's love spread the message with their amazing tesimonials about the MOST amazing Father.(hahaha , so much 'amazing' things are going on in YISS!! x] )After that , we had our first sharing session.It is through this session we get to know each other better , and it is the first event which I've overcome myself.I keep hearing a voice in my head asking me to just share with everyone , no matter how shameful it may be as it may benefit the people there.It's as if God wanted me to let go of everything , like if i want to be set free , i must first face the truth. So i did , and i enjoyed the sharing session as even though we have different backgrounds , we are all here for the same purpose : To experience God.
I think from here , i'll just post all the higlights as there is really going to be a lot to post. After that we had dinner , oh ya and the girls there are like eating very little. Must eat more! Being slim is one thing , but being healthy is what God really wants you to be. Hahaha. Ya , i kinda forgotten if Mass is before or after , but ya Mass was great , and the first day's theme was something like "God , the Father."
Yup , then went to sleep after that , it was like super doooooooper cold. Freezing even under my jeans and blanket.The next day my nose is like running with mucus...Ew.. okay. I'll end here for today. (: Praise God for day 1!! woohooo!

Vin

2008-12-15T02:32:00.000-08:00

Guys This Video Is Super inspiring.

Nooma - 011 - Rhythm -

God , Evian and Me

2008-12-07T05:14:00.001-08:00

In company the child rejoice , laughter and happiness fulfills him

Loneliness never finds him , despite being the only son

For the child do not have friends as such.

Sadness to the child , is but temporary

There is nothing , which could hurt him much.

But under the innocence , grows a shadow

The shadow which feeds on his happiness , and grows with the innocence

Never revealing itself to the child ,

the shadow named 'Evian' hides within his oblivion.

The child grows up , into a boy

Still as innocent , the shadow grows.

But a family broken , the boy soon learns

He must be fierce , to deter all

The shadow faded a tiny bit.

Like the mist , the fog , and the vapour.

He is able to see things clearer, but still conceived.

To protect his mother , he vow to thee

"I'll show them what i'm made of ,

If anyone tries to hurt her again!"

The vehemence in him propagated , by his steel resolve.

And so the boy walks on , with a heavy task on his back.

As the boy grows into a young man , his path dimmers

And the blue sky turned into an evil sanguine.

He lost love , he felt pain , and suffered betrayal.

An addition to his task were the scars he received on his back.

The young man is badly messed up , but he still has to go on.

At this time , Evian revealed itself to the young man.

Evian is what the young man is , and the young man is Evian itself.

Evian explains reality to the young man ,

Exposing the pains , lies, sins of the world.

The young man struggles on...

The young man is lonely , but yet for now , loneliness is his only friend.

He finally found Evian in him , but lost Trust as a result.

He no longer have a shadow , as he is the shadow himself.

But just as darkness was about to consume him ,

A hand so powerful dragged him out.

The quiescent background suddenly burst into life again.

The young man heard a voice ,

"My child you are My legacy. Do not worry , i will not forsake you. "

That voice so warm and familiar , at the same time so powerful...

It struck deep into the young man , as the Light pierces the sanguine skies , down onto him.

He looked up , and found home.

God is there , smiling to him.

The Evian in the young man is now an attribute of him ,

no longer a negativity.

He realises no matter what , no evil nor darkness around him

could reach him , as much as God could.

So he followed the Light , and continued his winding journey.....

The young man is Me , and being Naive(Evian) i guess , is forever a part of me. What matters most is , my eyes are fixed onto God... and all shall be fine..God does not mind us , who are messed up , but very often it is us , who shun away from God. Let us not turn away from God , as He will never turn us away.

The End.

By ViN.

2008-12-03T07:52:00.000-08:00

HIIII!!.... Yeah i am blogging yet once again. Just came back from Lan , with Zhongping , Samuel Quah , Marquez and Stanleeeeeey (Zong). Haha , played pool also. haiz so sian , today totally no form nor luck , kena owned in Cs and dota , and lost touch in pool. Everytime the ball was about to go in the hole , it just wouldn't.(wtf) -.- Haaahs , then after that went home.

Oh ya , went job hunting again with Zong and Nick yesterday , was out to a job agency called "Kelly Services" (sounds wrong , but dun xiang wai wai -.-). But in the end , we do not have a resume done yet , and they requires one in order to find the type of job we need. So we went off to Plaza Sing , in hope of finding a part time job sucessfully there. But , several shops are already out of vacancy , so we had no choice but to search again tomorrow, which is thursday lol. Hopefully got vacancy la... (and with lots of chio colleauges ^^ V ...... jkjk.)

And i am going to create a blog for SimPLy™ (Nick ,zong and me) soon! wahahahas , and will link everyone soon x] Haha and check out this cute thingy i found while we're job hunting. Saw it along the way inside a MRT underpass. It is found on the ceiling .Enough said , I'll let the picture do the talking , wahahahaahs :P

I am not a fool , I can tell. Just don't want to see her sad. Even if it means becoming your enemy.

ViN

2008-11-30T06:26:00.000-08:00

Hey , lol changed my blogsong to a 'trance' song o.o Hmm i really dislike techno and trance , but well , this song somehow got me , HAHA. It's dam addicting sia.. been stuck to my head a.k.a 'having earworms' bout that song. Love the piano at the start xD lols random. okay bye for now~

ViN

2008-11-29T07:34:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! i am back muhahahaahah!! i am alright now. Got over it already. Heh. Haizzz
so bored noww.. Even finding a job is soo ZzzZZz... Hmm. Anyways i wanna intro a very cool and interesting anime! It's Kuroshitsuji , A.K.A "The Black Butler". Freakin cool anime , though its theme is a little gothic and dark though , not suitable for kids /:

Hah , hmmm.. heh... so bored so bored so bored... T.T hurhur~ Okays nothing to say le , ciao...

"After all , i'm one akuma of a butler." (:

ViN

2008-11-27T22:30:00.001-08:00

WARNING : Emotional post ahead. Those who does not have the mood to see please avoid all these for your own sake. It's gonna get heavy. /:

It sure hurts a lot when she meant the world to you , while you meant crap to her. I feel like crap , indeed , right here right now. I am hurt again , deeply and badly. I prepared myself for this to come , but i did'nt know it would be this painful. I thought i've learnt to let go , and i wish i had. I wanna move on , someone please help me, i dun wanna get stuck in this pain forever.

Someone decapitate my head so that i'll not think of her anymore,
pluck out my eyes so that i will not see her photos anymore,
erase my mouth so that i will not speak of her anymore,
chop off my hands so that i will not go to her blog anymore,
chop off my legs so that i will not go to her anymore...
And stab my heart so that i'll not love her anymore...........

ARGH!!! Its like those permanent marker stains , where you wish you can wash it off.. but it is either stuck there , or have left an ugly scar. I really hate this..
my eyes are so swollen i dare not go out anymore , my nose so blocked i can't breathe anymore. I'll just fall back into the silence till i am healed again.. Waiting for the world to forget me..

SoLO

2008-11-26T22:41:00.001-08:00

Hi everyone... SingOut 2008 ended last night. A.K.A the last SingOut.. I feel weird. I feel like i did not do much yesterday , like i sort of dao everyone. I don't know why , yesterday didnt turn out to be what i expected. So much for being the ex-vice chairman of HIHS choir , i didnt even went to go talk with my juniors nor teacher. Haiz so fucked up sia.. and it is the LAST SingOut. ARGH. And i screwed up yesterday. Big time. I saw her , but i did not even went to talk to her , neither did i take photos with her. Dont know whats wrong with me.. i just hyperventilated yesterday , and my mind was in a blank. Before i knew what was going on... it all ended. No more waiting for me , cause this is the last time. No more seeing her.. No more thinking.....

ViN

2008-11-23T03:42:00.000-08:00

Yoz guys , it's been a while since i blogged in this currently semi-forsaken blog. lol. Was really busy during the period around prom. Kept shopping and shopping AND shopping..... and it went on for quite a while , till my legs are accordingly punished.Gonna post some prom pics , dont have the rest yet cuz the guy who was supposed to send me the rest of the pics is taking his own freaking ^#%@& sweet time (as usual) , procrastinating like there's no tomorrow , next week nor next year nor.....wadever.

This few days also went job hunting... went to apply part time job in many places in vivo.. like Toy R' Us , New Urban male , Esprit , blah blah blah... now waiting for call , if not i have to search for more jobs..

Anyway i am down with flu now -.- so i dont think i will be finding job tomorrow... perhaps till when i'm feeling better.So weak now....

ViN

2008-11-11T20:52:00.000-08:00

This is why i love cats. Cutest moments at around the end of video. Enjoy! ;DD

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2008-11-11T07:46:00.000-08:00

Hero of a different kind...

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2008-11-09T21:29:00.000-08:00

Hello... Ouchhhh today shoulder dam pain. Cuz in the morning i think i injured it by squeezing my pillow too tightly. -.- #%@^%&$&*

Today rained heavily in the morning , then my fan is directly blasting at me... then somehow in my subconcious , i didnt reach for my blanket. I just keep squeezing my stupid pillow. Then no matter hw i squeeze , still so freaking cold. Then i woke up. OUCH. Shoulder pain. T.T ZZZZZZ

Anyways i dreamt that i was the guy in the video again..but this time , i went to the hospital.. Instead of the doctors examining me , i remember it was Hojo , and he infused something hot in my chest. (not sure if it was chaos...) I remember it was freaking painful and hot.. like when i had my lung problem.. it's just like a re-enactment of the scene.. ARGH anyways got woken up by that shoulder pain thingy. -.-

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ViN

2008-11-05T05:53:00.000-08:00

Helllooooo~ Today is a very shag day , but quite fun haha. Today woke up at 1 plus pm , cuz ytd sleep very late , at arnd 1 plus am. LOL. Then zong called me , so i woke up , and went to meet him at compass point. Then reach there le , went to MOS burger for lunch , after that we headed off to bugis.

Went to go look around for our prom wear and stuffs , rackey rackey abit. Then we comb almost the whole of Parco shopping mall , then i finally found one shop taht has male formal suits for sale. So i went in to try a few clothes. Then there is this girl/woman , the shop attendant , she intro-ed to me a few clothes , including a white long sleeve and a black long sleeve one. Then i went to the changing room to test. Something anxiety invoking happened. I havent finish buttoning the black clothe , then the attendant opened the room's curtain le. I was like OMG.Then she helped me button up the remaining buttons. Walao eh... dam nervous. First time in my whole life a stranger is so close to me , and seen my abs.. just like that. And my first time a woman / girl older than me being so near me.

Then after taht i went to change my pants.. this time i very cautious liao , the attendant ask me if the pants is too big anot ; at that time , i knew she is gonna come in , so i told her i haven wear finish. -.-

If only she is more chio then i would have enjoyed the moment when she helped me button the shirt... HAHA jkjk , i am not a perv.Btw the attendant's perfume dam nice smell , as in different from the typical ones. Anyways the black shirt is really super fitting and nice ( i've finally found out the colour that suits me), so i bought it. Then after bugis , zong and i went to little india to shop awhile , then i bought kachang puteh ( or wadever it is). 1 dollar only , and it so nostalgic to be eating this traditional snack. haha , then went to orchard later. We combed a lot of shopping centres , walked until my leg suan T.T

After which , we went to Plaza sing for dinner (wah , now i realise i went to a lot of fking places today...) , then met Valerie Faith and her bf there. haha , after that went home.

ViN

2008-11-03T08:14:00.000-08:00

I feel like my picture right now. Dam ______ up.Cannot get to sleep these few days.
Mind kept thinking , and thinking , and thinking.....That's the price to pay for having a too active brain. ARGH! Turning grumpy due to my insomia or whatever.

Anyways today had SS O lvls. 2 topics which i studied came out as essay out of 3. Fortunately , before the exams , i have already calculated well enough. As long as i study four themes , anyone of which would 100% be included as a question in the essay. Heh , SS over le , but to me , it seems like the whole O lvls is over.. now left Pure Geog paper 1 and Science MCQ. Hmm... after - dinner desserts... subarashi.. :p
FREEDOM IS NEIGH!!!!

ViN

2008-11-01T08:48:00.000-07:00

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I really love this song a lot. It is very heartwarming , and somehow motivated me o_O.. Uh okay , better stop crapping , enjoy the video (:

ViN

2008-11-01T03:35:00.000-07:00

Hellos. Went to CSC yesterday with Nic and Zong , but Galvin din go cuz he went for chalet. On the way , we discovered something funny -.-

After that Nic went home , then me and Zong walked to Mac there. Saw Marcus studying , so we approached him. Zong went home first cuz he worried cnt catch last bus , since the time was already around 11.30pm. After that , i walked home with Marcus since he lives near me and he is gonna study at the void deck near ZhongPing's house.On the way , i discovered something SHOCKING from him =p LOL! (To marcus: I bet you know what i mean by this x] ) Then reached home , bathed then sleep.

ViN

2008-10-31T01:07:00.001-07:00

An empty room can be so deafening,
The silence makes you wanna scream.
It drives you crazy,
I chased away the shadows of your name,
And burned the picture in the frame,
But it couldn't save me.
How could we quit something we never even tried?
Well you still can't tell me why.

(chorus)
We built it up, to watch it fall,
Like we meant nothin' at all,
I gave and gave, the best of me,
But couldn't give you what you need.
You walked away, you stole my life,
Just to find what you're lookin' for,
But no matter how i try,
I can't hate you anymore.
I can't hate you anymore.

You're not the person that you used to be,
The one I want who wanted me,
And that's a shame but,
There's only so many tears that you can cry before
It drains the light right from your eyes,
And I can't go on that way,
And so I'm letting go of everything we were,
It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

(chorus)
We built it up, to watch it fall,
Like we meant nothin' at all,
I gave and gave, the best of me,
But couldn't give you what you need.
You walked away, you stole my life,
Just to find what you're lookin' for,
But no matter how i try,
I can't hate you anymore.

Sometimes you hold so tight it slips right through you hands.
Will I ever understand?

(chorus)
We built it up, to watch it fall,
Like we meant nothin' at all,
I gave and gave, the best of me,
But couldn't give you what you need.
You walked away, you stole my life,
Just to find what you're lookin' for,
But no matter how i try,
I can't hate you anymore. (X2)

2008-10-28T19:11:00.000-07:00

Hello... *yawns* zzz just woke up from sleep.... FUCKING CONSTRUCTION so blardy noisy
i close window le still so loud. Fuck sia , i really wanna go complain. Typical hor? =x Who ask them woke me up...i still need to rest before my O lvl physics leh.... ZZZ

Anyways... maybe i'll blog after my paper.. tata for now~

ViN

2008-10-26T05:32:00.000-07:00

The wednesday 22th post has been fixed. Enjoy the videos~ x]

ViN

2008-10-26T04:45:00.000-07:00

Zi Wo Cui Mian - Show

2008-10-24T10:32:00.001-07:00

FUCK! ONEMANGA GOT NO DISGAEA MANGA!! ^@%$&@%&^&^
sorry , venting randomly. -.-

ViN

2008-10-24T08:01:00.000-07:00

Yo! Had maths paper 1 today. Oh well , realised i did a lot of careless mistakes... gg.com.sg.

Anyways went to city hall today with Galvin , Wenqiang , Sheila , Aisha, Nic lee and Valerie Faith , for some job interview thingy. Just went to see see lor , incase i might need a part time job during the vacations. haha , but too bad the timetable hor , have to work on weekends. :( Life come first! dun wan after Os de no life-life still continue no life. LOL! So i quitted the interview upon knowing the working time slots.

The photo above shows the typical Galvin. Typical Singaporean lor , ppl take group photo he come and block me. LOL -.-

Top also show some awesome electric guitars i saw today. So cool sia their design. Got one is Gundam one , shaped after a weapon. ( Zaku Axe? o.O )

Another one is Doeraemon , xiao ding dang. So cute hahaah. Then my favourite one, the super cool transparent guitar!! Cool man. So gonna learn left hand electric guitar after Os. Okays thats all , bye bye (:

ViN

2008-10-22T10:35:00.000-07:00

Yo , haha these 2 vids make me laugh like siao... Can really help to destress LOL.
Funny skits by Jin of the band Kat tun (Cartoon)

The first one:

Another one:

Enjoy! x]
ViN

2008-10-22T01:00:00.000-07:00

Yoyoyo!! Haiz forgot to blog bout yesterday. Haha , was too tired..

Okays so anyway , yesterday had english O levels , and thank God , i survived the long hours....Paper 1 was okay , and fortunately i was able to relate with the topics. Paper 2 was quite easy , the compre was about Cats , so zhun , my favourite topic! LOL. First time in my life i wrote down two pieces of drafts for my summary. Wrote 146 words. Max is 150.

Oh ya , yesterday something fucking embarassing happened to me... like wtf man. Before the exams , the chief examinaer asked anyone if they had any un-allowed materials. Then i panic cuz i felt a piece of paper in my breast pocket. Then i was like "Oh shit , my english paper format... siao liao.." Then i quickly raised up my hand. ( Galvin say i raise up like very cool and calm like that -.- ... ) Then one examiner walked over to me. "Yes?" he said. Then i took the piece of "Paper" out of my pocket. "Huh?!" , the examiner replied. Then i looked at my hand. WTF!!!!!!!!!! WHY AM I HOLDING 2 PIECES OF 2 DOLLAR NOTES?! Then i quickly apologize to him -.-

Dam freaking embarassing la.. everyone near me was laughing -.-||| ZZzzzZz
Then i still remember the examiner also laughed. Then joked with me "You wan to bribe me ah? " LOL.

Okok... i feel lame posting this already... Off to my Geog-land....

ViN

2008-10-20T09:16:00.000-07:00

Hello. Man , i am blogging at such a late time. Supposed to be asleep by now , since tomorrow's the O lvl english. The timing siao one. Paper one at 2.30 start , then afterwards second paper starts at 5 o'clock. Damn fked up right? English is supposedly the most important subject , and yet the timing is so disastrously unfavourable.Like how are we gonna do our best for paper 2 when it's so freaking late , and by then we are prolly half-zombies alrdy.

Oh well. Anyways today had Chem paper. Hmm , time was tight, so room for checking my answers is very little.The Chem paper is full of traps.Basic questions but yet at the same time , tricky. I think i've fallen into one or two traps.. haiz cnt get full marks liao. sianz. Quite confident to get A1 , but of course , nothing is for sure , besides i still havent take my physics yet... So.. gotta work harder!

Okays.. i guess i better go sleep le. Nites!

ViN

2008-10-15T00:51:00.000-07:00

Maybe people like me arent cut out to be in love after all...I am an imcomplete person with lung problems. I cant do sports anymore..permanently.No one would wanna choose someone like me..There are much better fishes out in the ocean..I am only suitable to be a hermit crab..Maybe that's why i distance myself from people..Maybe that's why i am SoLO...

ViN

2008-10-12T08:11:00.000-07:00

Hey nin gens (humans)! Never blog for quite a while le , cuz gotta be a good boy and study for O levels. Haha.

Anyway the Sec 5 faith Star awards was a success! Well , at least it was , in my eyes. Though SimPLy did not manage win 1st place for superband ( sorry , cuz i screwed up the verses...I know we can better..) but winning's not important. All that matters is that we had a freakin load of fun!

Oh, still have the 5 Faith arena . Haiz didnt prepare cuz i was helping Galvin with his Art introduction writing at Kovan mac. Haha , but no regrets , just hope my efforts would help Galvin. (:

Okay la , think i will end the post here, not cos of what , but my com like freakin tio virus again. Fuck!!!! Now like type every 5 words , screen would freeze awhile.
Zzz all my fault for playing with virus.. TwT

Anyways , i love 5 Faith!!!

SoLO

2008-10-04T21:21:00.000-07:00

Fuck my blog is dead. LOLs!!

Okay anyway , gonna be extremely busy for these few days..Gonna piah the big Os.. ( dun anyhow think )

Sian sia ... now doing math tuition homework... siao liao la. confirm cnt finish... tuition teacher coming ltr in half and hour's time. And i still got a freaking maths paper 2 to complete... Haizzzzzz = =|||

And i hate it when my emotions hinder me. Irritating sia. Someone turn me into a robot plz , so that i wun feel like shit now. Okay back to homework , bye bye! ^0^v

DarK SoLO™

2008-09-25T09:11:00.000-07:00

Heyo. Argh. Dunno why but nowadays very sian.. and quite emotional..maybe it's cause i am going to leave my class soon...

Swinging back the pendulum , i still remembered the time when i first came to sec 5Faith. I went to class with hatred and anger...I dont even wanna be there. I was different back then. There was so much darkness inside of me ( caused by my lung problem and some friendship betrayal shits) , that i eventually closed up on everyone..I even had this resolve of not making friends , and just get on with the O levels..The first day of school was terrible... i dont have any friends there at all .. and my friends are all at poly or JC , while i am stuck in a sec 5 class.. I feel so inferior , so sucky.

I was so reticent that , during recess , i will hide inside the toilet for the recess to be over...cuz i dun wanna communicate with anyone.. I even sent a sms to "her". Cuz she's probably the only one left for me to confide to..But i am just so stupid..i waited and waited for the sms..but it didnt come when i need it the most.. but i dont blame her at all , instead i blame myself. I shouldnt keep bothering other ppl , it's time to just stick to myself. I feel so bad whenever i made her feel guilty or whatever.So since , i am on my own..'

But through time.. despite my aloofness , i became less closed-up.. even without myself knowing. And soon , i am laughing together with my classmates.. I made new friends , and my perspective of them changed.. cuz we are all in this together.. we have a same purpose , and that is to pass our O lvls. I soon developed a bond with them.. like Nic , Dew , Zong, marcus, ming jing and Galv and lots lots more like Valerie and Jason...etc.
I never expect myself to become friends with them , and i can proudly say , I do not regret it at all..In fact , i feel even happier in 5 Faith then in 4 Diligence , probably cause only Kiat keng was there for me at that time , and i hate the pai kias in 4 dil. To the core. Like fuck off man , act nia.

Sec 5 peeps are WAY better than those half-assed bitches. ( woot feel so shiok saying this ). I really hope that i will be able to maintain this relationship with my brothers and friends in 5 Faith, even after many many years later..until the world ends. Too bad , time is the enemy... therefore we must cherish the bond we have now. To all sec 5 Faith classmates , please support the 5 Faith star awards , because we are one family ( i am not embarassed to say this. (: ) Even i , a guy who has only been with you guys for one year , is already so attached .... so guys
please support.. and cherish the time we have left together..

Galvin , dun worry , even if no one wanna come... I'll still be there. Definitely. (:

SoLO

2008-09-19T05:21:00.000-07:00

Hello. Sorry for not blogging for such a long time.. recently fell ill. Got quite serious throat infection , think probably due to the over-straining of my voice. Had fever first , then sore throat.. Then got one time coughed out blood. Doctor says its normal cuz the throat wall dunno like very red. Then took antibiotics and stuff lor..

Haiz , now at home resting..So tired , bored and indescribably isolated...wanna go back to school soon!!! >.<

SoLO

2008-09-12T09:17:00.000-07:00

Hello people (: Just came back from Raffles place , whereby "Amplify in the city" was held. WOOHOO! it was such a blast haha. For those of you who dont know , it is an event organised by Amplify ( catholic youth organisation ) to worship and praise God , by gathering youths from all over Singapore.

Went with Nick and Zong to raffles.We took the MRT there , and we thought we were going to be late. Then saw Valerie at the Raffles MRT station. After tt proceeded to the venue , which is like after several mazes in the underground tunnel -.-

Then reached the place le. OMG sia , that place is so freaking grand and stylo. The praise and worship session took place inside an auditorium.Sang lots of AWESOME worship songs , and me , zong and nick were freaking high tonite. haha. In between the worship , the emcee , Mr Leonard Koh , one of the leaders of Amplify sort of discussed about a chapter in the bible.

It is super duper meaningful. The chapter is about Lord Jesus going all the way to Samaria to find this samaritan woman , to cure her of her problems.( her inner secrets , shame and sins)

He also said something which struck a chord within me.Ever wondered why shows of super heroes are getting more and more popular? Shows like Ironman , Batman and stuff. Actually , deep within us , we want to be extraordinary people. Seen , heard , and recognised by the others. We want our lives to be so much more than what we think we can do , which are to a limited extent.We have this emptiness within us sometimes. The feeling of lost , despair and "emo". These are the things which haunted me for sooooo long.

Let me tell you a short stoy here. In the icy regions of the world , do you know how do Eskimos ( those living in igloos ) hunt for food? They take a knife , dipped the knife in a dead animal's blood , and dry it.The process is being repeated over and over and over again , until the knife is totally coated in dried blood. The Eskimo then place the knife on the ground (Ice) , with the blade facing up into the sky. A wolf would be attracted to the knife , due to its animal instinct. It will continue to lick the knife , and as it does so , its bloodlust increases. It then begins to lick even more , until gradually , the coating of dried blood is gone , and the real blade reveals.The wolf dont realise that , the blood that its licking , is acutally its own. Eventually , the wolf died.

This is very real in our lives. When we are in despair , we will indulge in other meaningless things to find satisfaction. But the story of Jesus finding the Samaritan woman shows tt God is the only way whereby your "thirst" can be fully quench. Other means of finding satisfaction will eventually lead you to even more thirst , and eventually , more broken up. This is the same concept depicted in the story of the Eskimo and the wolf.

I've learnt that we have to run TOWARDS God , NOT AWAY. We dont have to have the fear of being afraid that God would be angry , because He is forgiving and loving.it is our perception , that he is angry with our sins , that often turn us away from God , who wants us to approach him instead.

After all , God is our father , someone for us to seek forgiveness with. The fountain of life , the water that will truly quench our "thirst". (craving for the thing you want deep within oneself eg. love )

SoLO

2008-09-11T10:01:00.000-07:00

Hey all. This is gonna be a long ranting post , so if you dun have the mood to hear me rant or vent , then please skip today's content.Haha see , i so considerate.Even ranting also got spoiler alert.LOL.Okay , here it begins.

I've been thinking for a long time , and i am seriously frustrated to the core about something. Justice , is it really there in this world? Why do all the lame and show-off people getting fame and recognition , but not the truly talented ones who deserved it?

The same goes for credit.I will speak the truth here. I fucking hate the SLB.Flame me all you want.Cuz u all do not know the fucking fact that goes around.I came back to the SLB , thinking with enthusiasm that i will be able to serve and work with pride in the council.But i was disappointed.I faced rejection in many ways. I didnt get to go to any Leadership camps.I was "advised" not to cuz of my pathetic body.

No one approached me in the SLB to talk to me.Only my juniors , Amily , Ming teck, Ying yan and my few classmates in SLB wud say hi and talk to me for abit. I am TOTALLY invisible in the SLB. During the Annual General Meeting , duties were given out to the councillors. I didnt even get ONE duty. If you think that they are doing so cuz i am sec 5 and i need to concentrate on my Os , then why the hell they give it to other sec 5 SLs but not me? Cuz of my lung problem? Cuz they think i cant do it?

FUCK. If i didnt want to do duty , i wouldnt even be fucking back in the SLB. What else do i wear the tie for? To let it get dusty? yeah , now perhaps. I find no sense of belonging anymore.People are not doing their duty well , and in the hall duty , i am the only one to fucking pick up rubbish and used tissue while other councillors use 'EYE POWER'. Fantastic. The ex-cos? even more pro. Level 2 'EYE POWER'. 'MOUTH POWER' also. Only talk cock. Do i EVER see them in action? Hell NO.

If you wanna fucking command ppl and gain their respect , then u better show a good example.But too bad u dont seem so to me. So u fucking dun get any respect from me. I am disappointed.I shall resign as a councillor , within the core of my being. For the tie, i will just wear it as a fashion statement until i get my freaking testimonial before i burn/disintegrate/melt/ it.

So much for "There is no "I" in team". The irony. "I" am really not in their team. Solo i go then.

As for love life , it is the same case. I will never be found , never seen nor heard. Yet i cant stop myself from falling in love.I am really disgusted bout the reality of this world , and the bunch of show-offs scums. I would really like to protect "her" from these bastards , but i cant. Its NOT within the locus of my control.What even fucking right do i have to protect her? I am just a guy with freaking lung problems unable to do anything.And these ppl are just gonna take her away from me. I can only watch , and pain is inevitable.

But anyways, i am still gonna be myself , and no one more. Cuz i believe in my values , even if i have lost , i wont be as bastard as them. At least...

SoLO

2008-09-04T07:26:00.000-07:00

ok , tt stupid ranting post aside , i forget to tok about the class reunion of 4 diligence07. LOl psps ah.. We had steamboat at bugis , then it is dam heartwarming to see all my ex-classmates back haha.Hope still got more outings like this sia xD.

Ok the pic above is dam random lor LOL . Kiat Keng , me(middle) , and Jia Le posing like crazy ppl for the camera LOL. Look weird sia hahaha. Anyway anyone got more photos send me pls tyty!! ^^

SoLO

2008-09-04T06:57:00.001-07:00

Yo...Dammit. Shitty things keep happening to me. For some reason , when i tried to
feel happy or motivated , the next day will always get me. So many things are really hurtin me badly..and they keep flooding in.. I am drowning under all these... Can something make me happy? For once? At LEAST???

Ppl keep saying i sound emo , look emo...wadever. But no one will understand how much i am going through.. No one , except God..I tried countless times to stand up after every fall , putting on a smile , just to hide my feelings..It's so stupid. Why
am i trying so hard , when eventually , everything goes down the drain?

Maybe i should be apathetic , so that i would not hurt so much.Maybe i should care less.. Why do i always have so much freaking hope when it is gonna hurt so much more? I always belived , that MAYBE something good will turn out in the end..guess i am just too naive , too stupid..

2008-08-29T02:25:00.000-07:00

2008-08-29T02:06:00.000-07:00

Hello... Today had Teacher's day celebration plus Cross country at punggol park.Then the weather was like drizzling a little , due to the monsoon season ( pure geog knowledge, mai siao siao hor! =x). So the mood kinda sianz liao..Then when it came to my turn to run , i was actually at the front row, where everyone was preparing to start running.Then i walked to the back.No point being in the front when i cant run at all..Then after that slowly walked.Then saw dew, then paced with him. Along the way i took a few pictures of the scenery outside the perimeter of punggol park , but i also took 2 pictures before the race in punggol park too , which i will post them on the next post , along with an update of my drawings ( sorry , still using same style)

I just felt that the idea of fusing cross country AND teacher's day celebration is a little ironic , cuz if you wanna make the teachers happy , then why the hell did you make them scream at you for not settling down fast?
In the end , they get angry instead.

Yup , thats all. What a day to amplify my incapablility. :(

SoLO

2008-08-25T05:48:00.000-07:00

How can i forget my crew? haha. We are SimPLy™ 3 crazy crackpots. Brotherz till the end.

Sim + Poh + Lee = SimPLy™ !

SoLO

2008-08-25T05:46:00.000-07:00

2008-08-25T05:39:00.001-07:00

Oh ya , gonna post some pics which i took while i roamed around Buangkok. Pictures of
some sceneries which i took , are quite lame , so pardon me for that =x

2008-08-25T05:35:00.001-07:00

Yo guys. I am back with more drawings lol . haha this time i focused on drawing simple characters , such as a simple short hairstyle. Will work on long hairstyle and male characters when i am more prepared. (:

2008-08-22T11:10:00.000-07:00

Omg the blog thingy below is quite fking accurate O_O

2008-08-22T11:09:00.001-07:00

What Melvin Sim Wei Siang Means

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.

You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.

You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You are very hyper. You never slow down, even when it's killing you.

You're the type of person who can be a workaholic during the day... and still have the energy to party all night.

Your energy is definitely a magnet for those around you. People are addicted to your vibe.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.

You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.

You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.

You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.

You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life.

You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone.

Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

2008-08-20T05:14:00.001-07:00

Hello.. hee today is such a boring day sia. Got back our prelim papers . Not well done , which is good. That means my plan is working. Wad's the plan? u think lor. its dam logical one.

Anyways , nowadays still feel very annoyed and emotional for dunno what fking reasons. Hmm.. something is wrong wif me? I got mood swing? wtf? no. Aiya dunno wad is it but it feels as if i am starting to get sick of everything alrdy.I just wanna
drown myself in music..Drown myself till i lose all these fking feelings.Until i turn into an emotionless zombie...

SoLO

2008-08-18T01:52:00.000-07:00

Forget the wad day liao.....

Once upon a time , there was a young boy. Being young and naive , he was captivated by many things easily..and out of all these , love. One day , he heard rumors of love being kept at the peak of a high mountain. Being idiotically honest and innocent , he decided to find it for himself... On the way up the mountain , he tripped and fell many times. He got hurt over and over again. However , he did not allow the pain to stop him, he had faith in love.He was determined to find love.What a fool.

He tried again and again , with each step , he believed that he was getting closer..He wanted to experience love for himself , after listening to how great the feeling of love could be.He never gave up , and eventually he reached the top..But love was not there..He was disappointed.All he got when he reached the top were scars , bruises and pain.Why was he trying so hard to find love? It was just a rumor..there are many other things the boy could do..But he still chose to go through the hard way..

A few years past...The young boy has growned up into a fine young man.The wounds are healed , but the scars remain.. The young man remembered what he had went through..His faith in love has not died yet.This time, the stranger whom spreaded the rumor , decided to climb with him. The young man was assured this time , nothing could go wrong , since the stranger was with him.

Then , the naive young man had his second attempt at finding love. During the climb , the young man was struggling as he did in the past , but this time , the stranger supported him , and gave him words of encouragement. The young man was motivated ; his confidence was boosted tremendously. He was close to the peak , he grinned happily to himself. He could finally feel love. Just then , the stranger accidently missed his footing , and fell, dragging the young man along with him...The young man could not hold onto the weight of the stranger , and eventually lost grip...They both fell deep into the deep valley beneath them..The abyss of darkness..

As they say , "Touch the failure, taste the success". This was never true in this case..the young man never found love.. never, despite his pathetic attempts.

The stranger's name is called..... "Hope".

SoLO

2008-08-15T10:22:00.000-07:00

8th day..

Yo. went to sch ytd to submit my chinese option form . Then met up with zong. We slacked at the space then saw so many wonderful painted benches. Haha dam nice man. Art class jiu shi art class. Hahaha. Hmm, then i began to experiment some manga drawing , while zong practiced his math . Then saw marcus and galvin , they also came to submit their option forms. After that went to kopitam to have lunch with them.

After lunch , me and zong decided to walk to compass point from hougang. hahah , yeah we WALKED. The weather is dam hot , but still decided to walk there , cause can exercise , plus we can free our minds while walking. Then we chatted , and decided to
have a short break at a kopitiam at seng kang before continuing. We grabbed a drink , and continued the journey.It feels so good to have a nice long stroll. The only irritating thing is the weather.

Then after that , we walked towards compass point along a pavement with open spaces across. We stopped halfway , and decided to sit down , cuz the scenery is dam calm , and the wind is dam shiok. Then we played music , and chatted. Then something made me extremely pissed off.

While we were sitting , a group of 3 boys , one about 17 - 20 years old while the others are still quite young , walked pass us. They were drinking bubble tea. Then dunno for what fucking reason, this boy shoot the pearl at me. Then i look at him , he somemore gave me a cheeky grin. Wtf sia , i really sibei dulan and was trying to control. Then the cb bangala teen say smth like "scared wad....stare stare stare.."
I almost snapped. Fortunately , i didnt. My values saved me in the nick of time (no pun intended , nick did not come with us =.=)

Then after that me and zong went to the library to cool down after the long walk. We discussed many interesting and personal stuff. We discussed about what will happen if i really went to beat that bangala up. I wouldnt want to imagine that , because when i go snap , i will seriously smash him , bash him , mash him and let him have it. I was worried about an overkill... what if i accidently killed him? And the consequences that comes after the fight. This made me hesitant , and moreover , my morals tell me to choose peace over violence. Unless zong kena beaten up , then i will beat that guy up to save my friend.

We also discussed about changing our personalitly. Being on the other side for so long, we didnt learn much about this world. Zong told me that , unlike me , he would like to get into trouble for once , into real life confrontation. Because he wanted to change , and fight his anxiety problems. Through the chat ,i came to know that he is somewhat like me. We are very introverted , and we want to change. Ususally when someone is being confronted by gang , they will be scared and stuff , but me and zong discussed about us dun give a heck to anything and just bash the other guy up. Maybe that feeling will change us. Not for the bad. I realise that fear is a must in someone's life , and it is not a shame to have it. Fear is the teacher of all things , it makes us think , and not do things foolishly. And when you overcome this fear , you get an incredible sense of satisfaction. This is what i wanted.There is so much to debate over morals vs. consequence. but IMO , morals are what that makes you alive , isnt it?

Conclusion : Getting into trouble is never a good thing.But for once in your lifetime , you need to get into one.Or else , you will never grow.That's how the world works , you dun search , you will never discover.

SoLO

2008-08-14T04:07:00.000-07:00

The 6th day...

Happy Birthday to me!! lol. Haha thanks to all who wished me happy birthday. Very touched , cuz u all still remembered me lol. Hmm , my birthday wish is very simple. I just wish that everyone would stay healthy and happy , that's all. haha. Actually
i almost forget today is my birthday , until Espoire smsed me. Thx guys! ^^

SoLO

2008-08-13T06:26:00.000-07:00

5th day..

Yo. haha going to post some of my drawings... pls give me comments , honest ones. Cuz i wanna improve!! tyty ^^

<<<>

yup thats all , pls comment and gimme advise thx!

SoLO

2008-08-12T03:56:00.000-07:00

4th day of endurance after damage..

I will be counting these days , where i have to go beyond the norm..The days where i have to endure this pain till after the "O"s. Well for those who knows what is going on , pls keep it to yourselves.. For those who are wondering wad the waffles i am talking about , i am talking waffle language hahaahaha...

Ok , today had science prac and english paper 2. Was seemingly easy , despite the fact of prelims being harder than the actual Os.. I just hope my body could hold on.. I dunno. I am saying this without any guarantees.. Just with that faith in me. Faith in God. In his plans. For now, i will just have to do what i gotta do.. Yeap. And i wish nick lim will come back..seriously , you have to make a difference.. No one lives your life , only you , and so only you can make a change. And yes, u CAN make a change. I know its hard , but i am fighting a battle on my own too.. and it ain't easy...

I dunno what the outcome will be , but.. i'll just live on. Cause no one's gonna walk the path of life for me. I have to do it myself.Yup , that's all.

And love hurts so much..the reason gone , but the damage stays..

SoLO

2008-08-11T04:37:00.000-07:00

Yo. Tml is chem prelim and english paper 2. Man , am i so NOT excited. Haiz.. My body feels so worn out. I am super tired. Mentally and maybe physically. It feels as though this body is just barely holding on now...

Argh i hate this feeling.. when there is no one in the house , and i am here experiencing this lousy feeling all by myself. I just wish one day after i wake up , i will find all this a big nightmare ..This world is so beautiful , yet so ugly.

................nothing to say le..

SoLO

2008-08-09T01:17:00.000-07:00

I feel lost... It's like ever since "that" accident , i am caught up in this twist of fate.. Everything is just not right. I feel like i am walking in the wrong direction..and somehow only with my shadow.

I just hope that everything is not so fucked up..I wish i have a stronger body. I dun want my lungs to keep collapsing just like that. I wanna do sports like the rest . I wanna do PE with my friends. I wanna run like no one's business.. scream like my lung wont burst..I dun wanna be confined to nothingness.. There are so many things i cannot do now. And when i look at others , what else can i compensate for? Only my brain. I feel so bad about myself too , I am not as capable as others. They have twice my stamina , and can live on without worrying. I live in fear everyday , praying to my dear Lord , that i will stay healthy..I dont want my friends to worry bout me anymore. I dont wanna be their burden.I hate that look on their face , i wanna bring smile instead.

And the world is cruel. I have learnt it the hard way. Betrayal exists. I am a victim of it countless times..to the point where i dont know what is real and what's not anymore.People can be real fucked up sometimes..they take advantage when you are good to them , and take it for granted.But , no one's perfect. So i'll just gotta live with it , with my own principles. I have my own values , they can keep theirs. There is nothing to lose for me.

I just wish... everything will turn out fine.. I still have my reason to live. I still remembered , a pastor once said that the Lord said " Endurance shall save your lives" . Somehow, this word is deeply etched into my head. And it has become sort of a motto for me to never give up. And i hope that readers here would also not give up in whatever you do.

Dam , i sound dam lame... Oh well sorry for all these. I just feel like venting everything out. Haha, dun take it to heart.

SoLO

2008-08-06T06:54:00.000-07:00

OMG. Before i forget , (which i almost did... ) Happy Birthday To BRAther Ming!!!! LOLOLOL

2008-08-06T05:26:00.000-07:00

Hello. Had my physics paper 2 today. Did a very stupid thing . I thought that the paper was 1 hr 30 mins , but actually it is 1 hr 15 mins only. So in between, i took a little break .. and...... ( you can probably guess where this is going to.. so no need to explain la -.- ) .ZZZ. ok la ok la. I ended up with no time to complete one question in section C. Only managed to do that question de first part. Haiz. Oh well , prelim are meant for you to make mistakes , not the "O"s. I'll be sure to not make such a stupid mistake again.

Haiz , kind of moody right now. Suddenly realised a lot of things. After "O"s , i probably would not be able to meet those people that i know this year anymore.. how sad. I wouldn't even know if i would come back to school after the "O"s , cause it's like i am not needed there at all...Then..... aiya no mood to carry on le la..
I could only watch , cause i can't stop time..
SoLO

2008-08-05T04:34:00.000-07:00

Hey. Today went to school at about 8 , although science prac starts at 11. Actually wanna go school at 7 de , but then after i wake up bath le, nick smsed me , say that he will reach at 8. Then i went back to sleep. LOL.

So i went to school at 8 , studied a bit on some crap notes about chemistry. Then felt kinda bored so me and nick started to draw anime.zzz. Then draw halfway saw galvin. First thing he ask me is "wanna follow me to 1 charity find junior ma? " Then i was like , anything lor. So followed him up. His junior wan galvin to help him draw some DnT stuff. Then its dam funny. He wanna go out of class but chinese teacher dun allow. So went down to space and watched galvin "fan nao" over how to draw the DnT thingy, haha.

Then after that is my science prac le... For chem, i did a lot of precautions. Like reading the questions freakin carefully. Oh well , the answer weird weird de. Haha.Guess that's all.

SoLO

2008-08-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

Yo. Had english paper 1 and pure geog today. Hmm , all in all i find the english topics relatively easy, but pure geog was a killer. I wrote like about 9 eff-ing pages la. Now my hand is like GG . Suan....to the extreme!!!!

Recently watched a video that zong sent me. The title is called "Earthlings", a documentary which shows how human disrespects animal , while "using" them for food and experiments.It can be found in youtube. (warning: extreme cruelty shown here) After watching , i felt dam indignated and disgusted. I felt f*cking shameful to be a human being .Those bastards in the video i wish somehow, nature or God would punish them. Totally have no respect for nature. This is really one thing i cannot stand. GRRRR!!!!!

Anyway , today went to hg mall. Then on the way , at traffic light there , someone marked on the floor "Tim pawns Solo". WTF? lololololololol... then nick and zong keep suaning me. zzz.

Yup guess tts all ^^

SimPLy™ , may the fellowship stay strong~

SoLO

2008-07-31T06:46:00.000-07:00

Hey. Tml marks the start of the prelims. With eng paper 1 1st, then pure geography for me. = =
I hope i can pass well , although i am not really gonna study much for it. (dun wanna risk the chance of accidently unleashing my full potential before the actual Os ). Oh well , time to enter stress mode.

Hah , and to ming ming , hope ur gastric is better :D ( ps for mistaking ur gastric pain look = sleeping position not shuang look -.-)

And , i am seriously wondering , if fact , i am feeling that people around me are starting to take advantage of my kindness... Its like , dam f*cked up can.But still , i cant change this soft side of me. Dunno why either .

Also to Nick lim, if you are reading this , please do your very best to fight the depression.I promise , i will do my best to help you in ur studies when you return.DUN LET HISTORY REPEAT. FIGHT , AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE! Dun forget our promise , we are gonna ace O lvls , remember? So , i will be waiting for your return. God bless you.

SoLO

2008-07-29T05:18:00.000-07:00

Heya. Sians. Prelims is coming. Like so stressed can. >_< Haiz..Plus school life so boring sia...
Dun really have any thrills/excitement/things that enthrall me?..Ugh. Argh sian laaaaa!!!!!!! Words cant describe how i feel now. So
sad + so sian + so stressed.. buntuay zui zui sia.. Grrr! T.T

Just a smile from you will do..

SoLO

2008-07-27T04:37:00.000-07:00

Yo sry guys for not blogging for such a long time.. Been quite busy and lazy , ironically. haha. Yeah, few days ago Ming Jing A.K.A CharlieMing started to recruit "Bras"!! LOLZ!!!
Actually is we toking bout brothers la , then i called her "Brother Ming" , then i dunno how she can from "brothers" tok until "bras"... ^!%#&$%

Haha , then zong , nick and me became her "Bra" ? O_O . And guys , run. She's still on a recruitment spree. >_>

SoLO

2008-07-17T23:39:00.000-07:00

Sometimes i wonder , why am i always working so hard?(Nobody gives a dam) Why do i contribute so much? ( I get sh*t for doing so ) Why do i reach out to others? ( They dun give a f*ck sh*t)

Am i being too kind / soft / weak? I just keep gettin hurt or f*cked up. That's it. Reality Check.

Screw the world

SoLO